随便写几句

没有写作灵感
还是说
没有灵感本身
就是灵感？

一个人在飞碟享受着招牌甜品
豆浆冰沙
配以
优格魔球
爱玉冰
红豆
这是人生享受

Mr Minus
那是新的代号
然后她们尽一切力量
想将她们的室友 变成
Mrs Minus
她们
还不理解
爱情
是不能强制推销的

怀念黑森林
益比杯换装潢后
连
菜单都换了（应该是饮料单才对）
大荧幕也不见了
再不能在哪儿观赏球赛
二楼还在关闭中
从此我
没什么回去了

Things we dont know and know

“ The secret things belong to the Lord our God, but the things revealed belong to us and to our sons forever, that we may observe all the words of this law. (Deuteronomy 29:29)

Today I attended a church, the young pastor of the church closed the service with the saying:

"We ought to be humble, for we know not the things we do not know."

True enough. So often we become arrogant when we learn about something, and think that "Ah ha! So that is it!", that we know all the things we need to know. But truly, if we are honest to ourselves, we will realize that we do not really know much. What we really know, is the surface and shallow part of the whole universe only.

If anyone supposes that he knows anything, he has not yet known as he ought to know... (1 Corinthians 8:2)

I suppose that one of the things that "ought to know", is that we know too little of things we ought to know, right?

On the other hand, I should say, there are things we are sure to know. "Things revealed belong to us and to our sons forever, that we may observe all the words of this law".

We may not know how God had created the universe, but we know for sure He created it with such wisdom, and revealing to us His divinity and greatness, that man are without excuse that they do really know Him.
We may not know how God can be triune, that is at the same time three and One, but we know that such is the way He is.
We may not know how God's predestination works with man's free will, but we know that both are equally true, and such belief assure us of our eternal son-ship in Him.
We may not know how Jesus Christ's divine and human nature unite in one person, but we know that He truly died and lived again, and still living, praying for us each day.
We may not know how Holy Spirit works in our heart, regenerate us, but we know for sure that He changes us, renewing and conforming us everyday to the likeness of God.
We may not know how, and when, our Lord shall come again, but we know with certainty that He will surely come, and bring us together with Him in eternal.

So much that we do not know, and yet, we can know much, and with confident, sufficiency, clearly, of things that He revealed to us, through both the nature and Scripture, that we may "observe all the words of His law" unto salvation. And ultimately, bring glory to Him, which is unto Him forever.

怕

也许
我其实不是不愿意爱你
只是
我惧怕

怕
伤害你
伤害自己

怕
在你愿意之后
我却
亏负你
一生的幸福

怕
原来我只是
利用你
来满足自己那渺小的
‘需求’

怕
自己背不起
爱
所带来的
责任
牵绊

怕
付出的感情
得不到
所期待
回应

所以
裹足不前
宁肯孤独终老
也不愿
破涌而出

（也许有一天
我被
天上的爱
感化 之后
我会来找你
只是那时
你
还会在原地等我吗？)

恐龙

那是新的绰号
干妹起的
说
干嘛还不找个伴！

她是好意
但是　我
老土
木讷
固执
潦倒
沧桑
不修边幅
居无定所
侵略性强
大男人主义
除了
不堪一击
不耐一吹
的体型
之外
我根本就是典型的
暴龙

在这时代
早已经
石化
只差
还没风化
罢了

又有谁
会喜欢和化石
谈恋爱呢？
所以
我继续
恐龙

好人

有人说
我是好人
我说
我不是

我不知道他为什么说
我是好人
但我知道
为什么
我不是

我在十岁就
离家出走
赌博欠了两千多块
偷家里的钱
骗全国人我是被绑架的

中学时期
骗父母要买书
多要零用钱
其实花在电玩

初中二
和主任顶嘴
结果见家长
不悔过

我的初吻
给了我才刚认识
不到一个小时的
女生

我作过第三者
而且
不止一次
伤害多少好女生

这样的人
是好人？
才怪

只是
你不认识我
罢了

Move on

"Love can touch us one time
And last for a lifetime"
~ My Heart Will Go On

Perhaps that is true
My past hoping that it is better if
It is not
So that I can really
move on

But the future of me
the ideal
is for it to be so
so that love when it finds its way in me
it last for the lifetime

So the dilemma is there
As the movie is showing
Some people is flashing in the mind
Some we thought we already let go
Yet, it is not

Well, let time do the magic
Perhaps one day will come
Whether we let go
or not
True Love shall brings us on.

For Christian Students 致基督徒学生

If you are a Christian and at the same time a student, and you wish to serve God and do well on your study but struggling how to balance things out, I pray that this would be helpful for you.
如果你是个基督徒学生，且希望能够同时服侍神和在课业上做得好，却面对如何平衡两方面的话，我祈愿这篇文章对你有所助益。

1. Set the priority right. 正确的优先次序
As a Christian, our first calling is to glorify God and to enjoy Him forever. God is and must be always on the top of our priority list. He is our Lord, He owns us. Then the His righteousness and kingdom, then His church, then study, ourselves being the last. The church here means the 'Invisible Church', which is the universal body of Christ, including all the saints from the past and future, nearby and distant, in contrast to 'Visible Church', which is a particular community in certain area. The reason that Church being above study is simple, for Christian is a eternal calling, while student is a temporal one, and bible teach us to set our sight on eternal rather than temporal. And since He owns us, and we understand that being student at a particular time is His assignment for us, hence we shall always prioritize and honor this vocation rather than ourselves interests.
作为基督徒，我们的首要呼召是要荣耀神，并以他为乐直到永远。上帝必须在我们的优先次序的顶端。他是主，我们是他所拥有的。其次，他的公义和国度，然后他的教会，再然后是课业，最后才是我们自己。这里所指的教会是‘无形教会’，指的是基督普世性，包括了过去和未来，近处或远处的主内肢体。相对于‘有形教会’指的是某一特定区域内的群体。之所以教会当优先于学业是因为‘基督徒’是个永恒的呼召，‘学生’是暂时的，而圣经教导我们当定睛与永恒，而非暂时的事物。且既然我们是属他的，并且明白作为一个学生是他在这时候给与我们的呼召，所以我们当尊荣这个使命，并将这身份置于我们个人的兴趣之上。

Such priority list is important for it set the standard on how we would and should organize our use of time, money, and other resources to accomplish the calling He set before us, especially when we are in dilemma of making decision. Shall we go to church when we have exam on the next day, and we yet to revise all the material? May I skip Christian Fellowship as I am yet to complete the lab report which due to hand in an hour after CF? Can we ignore church choir or any other ministry that we once plead to commit, to rush for assignment which would affect our grade at the end of the semester? All these are hard decision, which could easily made if we have the priority first set up.
先设定如此的优先次序是重要的。他帮助我们如何计划、使用我们的时间、金钱或其他资源来完成他的呼召。这尤其在我们面对困难的抉择时特别重要。明天就要考试了，而且我还没有温习所有的课业内容，那我们还要去教会崇拜吗？我的实验报告还没有完成，而且团契结束后一个小时就得呈上，那我可以不去团契吗？我知道我曾立志要委身于这个服侍，但是我可否先赶完这份会影响期末成绩的作业呢？这些都不是容易做的决定，但是立定了优先次序，我们将相对容易的作选择。

2. Discipline and self denial 纪律和舍己
The dilemma we often face in the last part is because of our failure to discipline ourselves. We use the time for study for games, Facebook, movies, etc. We spend our money on entertainment, brands, new phone gadget that is to release tomorrow, instead of on trainings, books, other equipments that could directly enhanced our ministry and study. We fail to focus on the One who called us from above and the tasks He set before us. The consequence is that we stack up a lot of unfinished assignments until the very last minute, which at the end of day put us in the difficult situation to make hard decision.
之所以我们时常面对在上面提到的矛盾，很多时候是因为我们无法自律。我们将应该温习的时间花费在电玩、‘非死不可’、电影等。我们将钱花在娱乐、名牌、明天发行的新手机附属零件，而不是对我们的服侍或课业有帮助的训练、书籍或其他器材。我们无法专注于完成那从天上来的呼召。结果，我们累计许多未完成的作业，至终陷于两难之间，‘被逼’作困难的选择。

If we could accept a less delicious food served in the college instead of walking an hour walking distant to get a nice food, so that we save more time to study; if we could spend the money on good dictionary and fine reference book instead of pre-order Diablo III; if we could just fast from FB and i-phone for some time so that we can fully concentrate on assignments, however desperate we are to beat other on Tetris Battle or update with the status of some 'special one'; if we could stay at home to study, both scripture and academic text books, instead of watching the title deciding football match of the century, ... all the dilemma shall reduce much, if not disappear all together.
如果我们愿意为了有更多时间温习，所以接受学院食堂没那么好吃的事物，而非到要花费一段时间到另一个地方享受美食；如果我们将钱花在好词典和参考书而非最新的电玩；如果我们能够暂时脱离＇非死不可＇，即使我们多么希望知道＇某些人＇最新的情况，至为了专心作业；如果我们愿意待在家学习神的话语和课业，而非到大荧幕前追看决定性的球赛，．．．那么即使上面所提的困难不会完全消失，问题也会减少很多。

We are called to bear the cross, to denial ourselves. The cross is never light nor painless, but it ultimately bring glory and joy.
我们被召原就是要背十架，要舍己。十字架永远都不容易背，且是痛苦的，但最终必会带来喜乐和荣耀。

3. Faith, prayer and wisdom.　信心，祷告和智慧
Suppose you had done 1 and 2 in an adequate fashion, and you still struggle with your performance, or worry about it, may I suggest that you are lack of faith in God? Sometime we know the priority and the discipline of life as a Christian student, but we tend to depend on ourselves, but not having faith in God. Do we really believe that 'Seek first my kingdom and righteousness, all the wisdom you need for your assignment and grade you need shall be given unto you'? Do we constantly pray for wisdom, and assured that He 'gives to all generously and without reproach, and it will be given to him.'? Is He Lord over our study, and the source of wisdom and understanding?
如果你确实地按照１和　２的提示进行，但仍然担心表现（比如考试成绩），请容许我问这个问题：您是否对上帝缺乏信心？许多时候我们确实知道作为基督徒学生的优先次序和生活纪律，但我们却倾向于依靠自己，而不是相信和依靠上帝。我们是否真地相信“先求我（耶稣基督）的国和我的义，你的功课所需要的智慧和成绩都会加给你”？我们是否时常向上帝祷告求智慧，并坚信“那厚赐与众人也不斥责人的上帝，就赐给他”？他是否我们的学业的主，使我们聪明与智慧的赐予者？

How's our relationship with God? 'The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, and the knowledge of the Holy One is understanding.' (Pro 9:10) Do we fear Him? Do we really know Him? (The root word of 'knowledge' is the same word used in Gen 4:1, which connotes intimate relationship.) Do we 'Trust in the Lord with all our heart and do not lean on our own understanding. In all our ways acknowledge Him, and He will make our paths straight.'? Things may not happen the way we wanted it to, even when we put Him first and put in effort to complete the study, but we do have a reason to rejoice in spite of that for 'we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.'
我们与神的关系如何？‘敬畏耶和华是智慧的开端，知道至圣者便是聪明。’我们是否敬畏神？我们是否真实的认识他？（‘知道’的原文带有亲密关系的含义。）我们是否“专心仰赖耶和华，不可依靠自己的聪明，在你一切所行的事上都要认定他，他必指引你的路”？即使我们实在的将上帝摆在第一且尽力完成学业，我们仍然可能不会得到我们所期待的结果。但就算如此，我们还是有喜乐的理由，因为‘上帝使万事都互相效力，叫爱神的人得益处，就是按他旨意被召的人。’


I must admit that this is far from perfect, as still a lot of details and practical advices are lacking, but I wish that this few basic principles will help us in our calling as a Christian students.
我必须说，这篇文章还是有许多不足的地方，得别是在一些细节和实际的建议上有所缺乏。但我盼望着几个基本原则可以帮助基督徒学生完成神对我们的呼召。
共勉之

Let dream be dream

Dreamed of acting in a movie with Anna Kendrick today.

We met each other in a university. Course mate perhaps? Or maybe just happened to be in the same campus? I don't know. It doesn't seems to be much significant in this case.

What is significant is, we met.

We see each other in the eyes. We sense something in each one's mind, or heart. I didn't go straight to her on first sight. Shy. Perhaps the introvert of me wants to keep things low. Perhaps I'm low esteemed, especially before such a beauty. I just smiled, or perhaps blushed, and immediately turn my eyes on the lecturer, pretending I'm focusing on lecture.

Of course, love has its way to bring us together. We, somehow, get to know each other. A lot are there courting her. Certainly, for such a gorgeous creature she is. Yet, she haven't decide on any.

Until, the day she met me.

Something is happening between us. Slowly our lives overlap. We became more involved with each other schedule. Somehow, we study together in the library, walk through the park, pass by the lake and stop there fooling around with the beautiful scenes we could find. We spend a lot of time together.

Then, another guy appear. She struggles.

He is hot, strong, solid build, English, humorous, gentlemen with a bright sunny smile always on his face. I am a dull Chinese, not so fluent in English, smirk constantly before her, skinny, boring. He drive Ferrari, I bicycle.

But we got through it. She choose me. We never had sex. She thought of making with me, but I said, "I prefer to keep the distance, as for now, so that I can see you clearer. I want to see clearly, completely, who this lady that I wish to spend my whole life with. As for the most intimate things that we can do, I should reserve the best for the last." She took it.

We got married a few years after graduated from university. We live a simple life. A family not without quarrels but with constant acceptance and understanding.

But, all this, just a day dream.

Dream it is, so dream let it be.

内向

我是很内向的。

。。。（给你几秒笑一下先。）

真的，我是很内向的。我知道，这你或许很难接受。但是我真的是很内向的！（连感叹号都出来了！）你不觉得吗？

呵呵，是的，在你们眼中，我蛮健谈，某程度上好动、爱演（！），很多时候也是很主动地social一下的。

但是，那真的就不内向吗？

比起社群，我是比较享受独处的。
比起吵闹，我是比较喜欢安静的。

我喜欢一个人去海边吹风看日落。开始怀念小时候，常不五时就到骑着老铁马，经过那一尺宽的木桥，到那遍满花岗石的海边，迎着时徐时急的海风，眯着眼睛盯着潜向远洋的红蛋黄。偶尔，他会躲在乌云后，和你玩躲猫猫。那时我就不睬他，爬上那棵孤树，依偎着它，闭上眼睛，幻想自己在空中漂浮……

我喜欢一个人在家读书看小说、上网非死不可。以前没有非死不可，没有腐烂死得，只有大哥从书店租借回来的黄易、金墉、古龙，后来弟弟也带回扳本齐史、川口开志等，间中妹妹会买些琼瑶、琴凯伦等，都是我上大号的最佳拍档。

我喜欢一个人坐在角落喝酒（不一定是酒啦！茶、水、咖啡都有，看场合。）喜欢静静的观赏（这个词这样用，有点那个……）情侣间的互动，哥们间天南地北的瞎扯。那是很享受的，看着大家的交流，阅读每个细节、小动作、眼神，背后的含义、感情：这都丰富了我的生命。

我是真得很内向的，你——难道不觉得吗？